My last post got me thinking about de-cluttering…
I can de-clutter the house – go through the drawers and the closets, getting rid of all the “stuff” I have that clutters up my house and my mind. I can make things clean and clutter free. A bit daunting at the moment, but with some concentrated effort, I can do it.
But how do I de-clutter my soul? Get rid of all the crap that I’ve been dragging around my entire life that I can’t seem to let go of? The stuff I have no idea HOW to let go of?
Do I really need to carry around the hurt from being made fun of while I was growing up for being fat? Does it serve any purpose for me now? How do I put it in a box and set it out for the trash? Same thing with every man or boy who has broken my heart. Or every time I felt like my parents didn’t love me or were disappointed in me because I’m fat. How do I get rid of that?
How do I tell my Binge Eating good bye and walk away from it as I’ve walked away from people who brought bad things into my life? How do I stop myself from running to food for comfort when I’m sad or stressed, or for something to do when I’m bored, or for the myriad of other things I use food for?
It feels like this is something I HAVE to figure out how to do in order to lose the weight. Most days it feels like I’m just killing time until my time is up… Like a bad day at work…
2009/08/17 at 16:08
i know exactly how you feel. some days i think i’ve got it all straight and “de-cluttered” and then those negative thoughts and habits creep back into my life…